who am i?
a good question, something i don’t know the answer to myself. i’m sure i’ll find out somewhere and sometime.
me at the moment?
i’m just sat in my bedroom, lit only by the monitor of this computer screen and the fairy lights above my head. thinking about things. wanting to pour my heart out to no one in particular, but i’m still unsure.
i’m listening to ‘Free Until they Cut me Down’ by Iron and Wine. It’s one of my favourite songs at the moment i think.
It’s bitterly cold outside;
snow is dancing manically
around the gentle orange glow
given off by streetlamps
that line the pavement.
I was going to write a poem tonight,
the topic being somewhat
self-indulgent
as usual. But then,
there are no sickening metaphors
to describe this disgusting irony.
Being at a comedy show
and receiving a phone call
from a best friend.
Who, in tears,
tells you that
her boyfriend hung himself this morning.
my best friend’s boyfriend hung himself yesterday. i was watching a comedy show when she called me to tell me. i didn’t answer her call and rang her back in the interval. then i went back in and carried on laughing at the rest of the show. i’m such a shitty person. i’m going to catch a train to see her tomorrow as soon as i finish work. no one deserves something like that to happen, least of all her.
mostly, me at the moment is just waiting for him to come online. so we can have another of our 4 hour conversations. the thing that i look forward to all day. because i get addicted to people. because i get addicted to the wrong people.
